My Contemplation (I know it's never good, but hear me out folks)

Okay heck I'll admit it. After qualy in Brazil I thought "It's over, I'll just go to sleep tomorrow during the race and dream about pink bunnies, beats watching Kimi being beaten again and Lew with the crown on his head sambaing his way up the podium." But curiosity got the better of me and I tuned in anyways (yeah Bernie you can keep on smiling, you're still grabbing money from me!). When Lew got pushed out by Ferd, one (who's never been a fan of the unibrow) can only think "I need to give him more credit." Credit for Stepneygate another might add? Oh wait, that was more of Pedal de La 'Fiddle' Eeek's fault than it is of the door slammer's. My bad. So kudos.

So after seeing a glimmer bit of hope, at the back of my mind it says "The Kimster can do it" and "Lewis choke please" oh and of course "Masswarf (okay maybe I gotta stop calling this one names too... *My New Year's Resolutions is pilling up...* How bout "Sweet Talking (Portugese) Felipe?"), (alright, alright, alright) 'wiggle Felipe, keep Alonso at bay please!" I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw Bananas Lew slowing down and thought I knocked my head on the wall or something (oh there's another bunyon *yay, not* *chips dropping outta my mouth from hanging it open too long*). So happy ending for Kimi fans, finally.

And now after the race, is it me or did someone hit a vocabulary guide across Kimi's face? Or is it the job of one hell of a pr guru (no I'm not talking about Matt Bishop)? Can you believe how much he's saying? I.e. "so happy it hurts", "in love with the Ferrari team", "want to feel this joy again one more time." To think when asked about the F2007, the unibrow and fiddle knows more than his "it's red and shiny, it's really nice and it goes fast." Don't get me wrong. After the very messy and complicated second half of the season it has been, a little serene simplicity from the Kimster is much appreciated now that you think about it... Bottom line, Home Run people, Home Run (a smile cracked out too, Smile Boy, SMILE!). Ferd the Blurb ain't doin so bad himself, thesaurus wise with those synonyms that is: “a plan, a hope, an illusion, a desire” (where's the "a revenge, a scheme, the Flav?").

With such a superior package this year, why didn't McLaren win? Well besides it having something to do with Ferd the blurb and Pedal de La 'Fiddle' Eeek, no wait that's pretty much it. Oh well there's always next year with Bananas Lew...

The FIA. The Federal Institution (of) Asses. What a pendulum. Everyone loves 'em right? They are as fair as one can be. Of course that is as true as raw donkey $#!t being edible. Their decisions were unbiased, they punished fairly and got every damn details right. Now I'm tipping the line at sarcasm. The one thing the FIA is is a crappy load of brewed up $#!t. All the more and nothing less. Enough said don't you think?

Honda, Honda, Honda. You and your vegetable-car-green-and-blue-mashed-up-dough-livery junk. Heck you may not have gotten anything this year (except for engine busts up heated to the point where you can barbecue your t-bones on the most expensive grill) but walking home with the UNEP Green Awards is reward enough isn't it?

Spyker, I mean Force India. The names continue. From Jordan to Midland to Spyker to Force India. How long before it changes to Force Bumper Cars? Does that mean their drivers next year would be Indian? The name is almost as inconsistent as McLaren's Johnnie Walker Dog Fight Commercial (boy they must be kicking themselves at the fact that they have to re-shoot it again).

Now did I get to the part where the FIA allows a darn appeal to go through just to say that it's inadmissible, maybe from the fact that the appeal was submitted after 30 minutes from the posting of the race results? So McLaren might have lost the appeal by 30 minutes? Ouch! By the way, if I was Ron, I'd fire Ian Mill. The idiot brought in 2 duck eggs for McLaren while Nigel Tozzi is laughing to the bank from winning the case for Ferrari regarding the first spy scandal. Come to think of it, he can even out talk Max any day! Lawyers, pain in the a$$es, but ruthlessly efficient...

McLaren's Appeal Deemed Inadmissable, Talk About Salt On An Open Wound!

Yup mere minutes after I was done happy dancing (and singing Kimi got to keep his crown 3x) I got in my rss feed a title that said "McLaren awaits full FIA transcript" I thought oh God, they're gonna appeal that too?" As a formula 1 fan I can only say I am downright sick to the pit of my damn stomach. Just as I thought oh now Spygate's finally over and I can move on with the off season, here comes Spygate II! Sheesha (well hopefully you know what I'm cursing with...) !!! And then, our dear old Jean Todt, the soon to be replaced by Stefano Domenicali as Gestione Sportiva for the Scuderia, topped the cherry on the sundae with this: "The decision of the international court of appeal finally brings to an end a very intense season, both on and off the track. A final and desperate attempt to change the result obtained on the track was rejected. Now, all our efforts are focused on preparing for next season." Shift your attention to the part that said "A final and desperate attempt to change the result obtained on the track." Talk about pouring even more salt on the wounds... But hey by my books, it's "Go Jean!" Who said Todt was on his Todt? Nah I'm kidding, you gotta love the guy for b!*@hin RD who sadly should have used that $50 mil to get himself a therapist/shrink. He's practically dragging Macca into a hole, i.e. digging their own darn grave! After totaling what, 5 drivers? The F1 world, hate it or love it, it's always entertaining...
Scoreboard
Ian Mill 1 --- Nigel Tozzi 2
McLaren 1 --- Ferrari 4

We Can All Breath Again: Kimi Gets To Keep His Crown

Yes people Kimi gets to keep his crown. YIPPEE!!!!!! Boy you have no idea how glad I am! Just when I was about to pick up that phone, book a ticket to Paris, and get a few cans of spray paint to vandalize the walls of the FIA's headquarters... Or start a petition to do some sort of damage and noise preferably. To think Nigel Tozzi (Ferrari's lawyer) had called McLaren "shameless hypocrites devoid of any integrity" and Mill half contradicting half merry-go-rounding statements. Don't look at the big picture, oh go disqualify them, what would you do if it was any other team? And poor old Martin and Norbert were left hanging out there looking like idiots for saying the point of the appeal was not to hand the crown to Lew! Equality, equality, equality, integrity, integrity, integrity, honesty, honesty, honesty, ethics, ethics, ethics, morals, morals, morals. Gee that sounds familiar, oh wait right, they are Ron's very wise *broken radio* words. Reading something that long equates to how boring it is to hear Ron say it, even though it's only mentioned once! Hhhmmm. Someone should add, "looking at the big picture. Ron already screwed up 5 drivers and a few of Macca's chances to get the crown, he needs to r-e-s-i-g-n. What the heck is next for them ahh? Ohh we want to appeal Kimi's speed during the Brazilian GP. He was too damn fast and young man, you were speeding! Oh wait, they're waiting for the full transcripts so that they can possibly appeal THAT too... Nah I'm just kidding. Senna wanted out, Mika flat out gave up, JPM flew over the pond, Kimi's hand was forced and Alonso wanted out, MID-SEASON of his first year there. Well that's one fantasy he found out isn't actually that sweet... And in other news, the CRB (Contract Recognition Board) has ruled that Timo Glock is free to drive for Toyota. The whole shebang started with him signing a deal for that vacant seat at Toyota next to Trulli next year while under contract by BMW as their test driver. Talk about tug-of-wars and a reminiscing walk down memory lane to when Button had overlapping contracts...

Dear McLaren: Where's Matt Bishop?

First if all, WHO THE IS MANAGING MCLAREN'S PR TEAM? It is a complete shipwreck, like the Titanic itself! First Martin Whitmarsh says they want clarification, fine, all you have to do is call up the FIA and ASK! But nooooo, you wanna ask with the help of your dear old lawyer Ian Mill and then bring it to court. No one on this earth brings a matter to court unless they want something in return and another's behind handed. Then after the revealing of NOT ALL fuels of the cars are checked at the end of a race rather just a random number of cars (mainly the podium finishers) and not the whole grid is another revelation!!! You just gave Nigel Tozzi a loop hole to argue on if Kimi loses his crown. Oh wait, my bad. And now McLaren fighting in a ring with merry go round facts... Fire the lawyer, hire a better one and put the Bish in effect is the way to go.